ANNE McKEE: Paying a high price in pollen season

Published 3:30 pm Thursday, April 11, 2019

STEROIDS!

Enough said.

For me and probably many of you, it has been a week of steroids. Yes, our little southern town has been deluged with an assault of pollen and yes, we do expect the frothy stuff each spring, really we do, and we know the big payoff is blossoms and blossoms of our favorite annuals.

But (hold on while I grab another tissue), I sometimes dream of a spring without pollen. Yeah, I say, this year just give it a break you guys. We can buy artificial for one year. Good grief!

I have those thoughts when the steroids kick in. You see in order to survive spring (and I am very thankful for spring each year) but once I get past the aggravation of allergies that sometimes can graduate to a sinus infection, plus MFA in bronchitis, and doctorate in laryngitis. I know it is all because of the freaking POLLEN, well then I’m done. There, I said it.

Oh, at the big sinus graduation party each year, those uninvited guests show up. Watery eyes, red noses, ears that no longer function (like, what did you say?) and a sore, sore throat. Not to even mention the big culprit but I will anyway. SNEEZES!

Sneeze ‘till you drop, hold it, hold it – then the big explosion which you try to conceal either under your armpit or even down your shirt, never works, does it?

But the worst of the worst is STEROIDS. Now the doctors mean well, because you know, the bad little pills do work, that is if you can live through it. And the little box of ‘em looks innocent enough. You know the drill, pop the little oblong, off-white pill out of its package: First day take seven, second day is six and day by day until the end of the week. By then, you are either well or dead.

And, oh, by-the-way, you know that little instruction sheet included with your meds? It might be best to put that information to the side until after completing the prescription, not that I’m seriously recommending that, but if you read it all, you will never gulp down, not one pill.

Why? Because it’s scary.

Here is an example:

Possible Side effects: Elevated pressure in eyes, fluid retention (swelling in lower legs) high blood pressure, **mood swings and other psychological effects**, weight gain, high blood sugar, thinning bones, loss of appetite, nausea, muscle weakness, skin bruising and other stuff.

If you noticed, in the above list I used the symbol ** to indicate perhaps one of the most noticeable side effects when consuming the drug. Well, at least that’s what Hubs said.

You see when I arrived home Monday afternoon after the doctor’s visit with a big sack of drugs, Hubs immediately asked. “What you got there?” Then he sort of stuttered, “Not steroids?”

Yep, it was the “S drug” plus I had had a big shot of the stuff at the doctor’s office so I was sort of already on my way into steroid-land and it has been a crazy ride.

As I type along this morning, I am on day five. That’s right, five days of high-strung nerves; eyes wide open at 3 am, thinning bones, high blood sugar, muscle weakness, but not loss of appetite. Nope, I never lose the appetite. Sigh.

And so it is Friday … Saturday … Sunday – Hubs is counting down.

Anne B McKee is a Mississippi historian, writer and storyteller. She is listed on the Mississippi Humanities Speakers Bureau and Mississippi Arts Commission’s Performing Artist and Teaching Artist Rosters. See her web site: www.annemckeestoryteller.com