Make those precious memories now

Published 9:12 am Tuesday, August 5, 2025

I’ve seen the following posted on Facebook several times, most recently today—Friday—as I write this column:

“I’m getting totally fed up with people whining about the price of things – $2.50 for iced tea, $3.50 for coffee, $4 for a slice of cake, $5 to park the car. Any more complaining and I’m going to stop inviting people over.”

I can’t help myself. I laugh every time I see it. Even now, as I think about it, I get a little giggle.

It reminds me of my dad. I grew up as a preacher’s kid, and yes, I know all the stories about how preacher’s kids are the worst kind. I have a theory about that. If it’s true, it’s because we played with the other church kids. But I digress.

As a preacher’s family, Mom and Dad were big on hospitality. We had lots of folks in our home for meals, fellowship, and fun. It was a regular thing. As far as I remember, it was always coordinated. There were no surprises. But like I said, it was always fun. One regular visitor was known to say that going to the Ferguson’s house was a trip.

Some of that trippiness usually came from my father. It never failed that immediately after saying grace, my dad would say to my mother’s chagrin: “If you are of a mind to eat what’s mine and the kids, go right ahead.”

Most folks laughed. Us kids grinned. Mom always grimaced, groaned and gave Dad a little bit of side-eye. But it was fun and expected. Dad’s predictability and sense of humor is probably where I got my go-to line when presented with the check at a restaurant: “I didn’t order that.” I think my family expects that from me too.

All these years later, those days remain sweet and precious memories of laughter, family and friends. Like most families, ours has endured losses over the years—some normal, natural and to be expected, while others have been tragically unforeseen.

Loss is extremely hard. Grief is some of the toughest work you can ever face and the darkest nights you might endure. I don’t believe you can ever be completely prepared.

But as preparation for when grief inevitably comes, make those precious memories now. Fill your life with laughter, family and friends. Pick up the phone. Set the table. Grill burgers. Tell stories. Create traditions. One day in a future that may be closer than you think, you’ll be glad you did.

“You turned my wailing into dancing; you removed my sackcloth and clothed me with joy, that my heart may sing your praises and not be silent. Lord my God, I will praise you forever.” (Psalm 30:11-12)