Recently our 2-year-old grandson, Jordan, spent the day with Me-Maw and Pe-Paw. Of course, since Jordan said his first couple of words, he has called us Mu-Maw and Pu-Paw, and we are OK with that. I think Mu-Maw sounds too much like Moo-Cow, but I go along with it, anyway.

On this day Jordan charged in the door with all of his essentials, including his sippy-cup, his shades (it was a sunny day) and a stack of Barney tapes. Barney? You know about Barney, don’t you? Allow me tell you my version of Barney.

You see, he is this purple dinosaur. Yes, I said a purple dinosaur! And, as an aside, he is worth millions. He dances and prances, sings and trills out ole favorites and the new dinosaur stuff, too.

You ask, what is the “new” dinosaur stuff? I’m so glad you asked, and stay tuned. I shall get to that part shortly.

But to the ole dance favorites, Barney is quite proficient with the polka and turkey-trot — I have to say, of course, this is only my opinion — but he seems a little slow on the shimmy and his tap-dance could use a some polishing, as well. However, he is simply dynamite with the jitter-bug and not too shabby with his clogging, either.

I have only witnessed one time (and one time was enough) his version of the ballet. I admit he accomplished this phenomenon with style and grace. He is actually very light on his dinosaur feet, but it was the tutu that sort of threw off the mood of the Sugar Plum Fairy, not that I’m complaining.

Now, as I promised, to the “new” dinosaur stuff, at least it’s new to me.

Barney has these two little dinosaur friends or perhaps they are relatives, I’m not sure. Anyway, Baby-Bop and B.J. are almost too much for Barney. I mean, they are ripping and romping around all over the place, and they seem to get on Barney’s last nerve. I know they do mine. However, they have brought some new energy into the whole schmaltz, I suppose.

So, little Jordan and I were on about the third showing of Barney, Baby Bop and B.J.’s camping trip when Pe-Paw walked through the room. I admit it is startling to be out in the “real world” and suddenly have a face-full of Barney and the bunch.

Pe-Paw stopped with a jerk when he witnessed Barney and B.J. all dressed in their camper-style camouflage. It is unsettling, but little Jordan was all intrigued, and so was I, for a short while.

You see, Baby Bop was afraid of the dark, and well, Barney and B.J. put her at ease with a serenade of “Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star.” I suppose you had to be there to get the full effect, but it was very touching.

However, Pe-Paw didn’t see it that way as he commented, “What kind of get-up is all of that?” Little Jordan looked at Pe-Paw, and excitedly yelled, “It’s Barney!” Pe-Paw hesitated another second or two and then turned toward the kitchen. He said matter-of-factly over his shoulder, “Think I’ll get the garbage together.”

But before I could blink my Barney-weary eyes, Barney and the whole bunch had moved on to Grandpa’s farm. There were ducks, pigs, cows and horses, all harmonizing with Barney and company.

Baby Bop had a solo with “Itsy-Bitsy Spider,” one of my favorites. I think I spied Babe, the piglet, and I’m pretty sure I saw Donkey from the movie “Shrek.” But, maybe not. It’s all beginning to mesh together.

Before we knew it, the time had slipped away and Jordan’s mom had arrived to take him and all of his stuff home. We said hello to her with bleary eyes as we packed Jordan’s bag, making certain all of the Barney movies were tucked away until the next time, and the next time, and the next time. All kids seem to get stuck in the world of Barney.

So later, as I was reliving my Barney day, and thinking of the millions, I remembered Pe-Paw’s saxophone-tooting abilities, and I could just see a purple dinosaur blaring down on the sax. You know, for a couple of mill, I might could talk Pe-Paw into it.

No, probably not!

Yes, it was just Barney and me, plus Pe-Paw, too, enjoying our day with Jordan.



Anne McKee is a retiree and freelance writer who lives in Meridian.