‘LEAN ON ME:’ Mother uses loss as a step to prevent suicide

Published 2:01 pm Thursday, September 13, 2018

When Justin Blanks died in early 2015, his mother, Rhonda, was devastated.

She knew he’d been depressed since a car accident left him severely injured, but she had trouble accepting that her son, a talented, outgoing 27-year-old, took his own life.

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“He always wanted to help people,” Rhonda Blanks said of her son, a Lamar School graduate who earned two degrees at Mississippi State University and enjoyed skiing and kayaking. The young man – nicknamed “JB” – also loved photography, hunting and fishing. He had tons of friends and loved spending time with his family.

“You feel anger,” Blanks said of the days and months after her son’s death. “And weak as a parent for not being able to help. You feel despair, you feel like you want to join him.”

The tragedy also tested her deep Catholic faith.

“Why did God do this to me?” she kept asking herself, over and over.

In time – several years, she says – Blanks slowly came to terms with her son’s death, and at the urging of a close friend, finally admitted to herself that he had committed suicide.

“When I was able to do that, it just kind of hit home,” she recalled.

As her grief lifted, Blanks realized she could do something to help other survivors of suicide. She reconnected with an old friend, Vickie Winslett, the president of the Mississippi Alliance to End Suicide, who encouraged Blanks to publicly share her story, knowing it would resonate with people.

“I reached out to her and told her that sometimes, you have healing when you help someone else,” Winslett said. “You have an opportunity to save someone else’s life.”

Now, more than three years after Justin Blanks’ death, his mother’s efforts to help those suffering comes to the lawn of city hall in Meridian this weekend. The event, called “Lean on Me” is planned for 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. Saturday, Sept. 15.

On tap are an eclectic selection of live-music performances, from the inspirational sounds of the Firehouse Gospel Choir, roots music from Britt Gully, a set from the Acoustic Crossroads Trio and uplifting pop/rock from My Savior Story.

In addition to music, the day will also feature family-friendly activities such as a petting zoo, face painting and pony rides. A host of organizations will also offer resources for those with mental health needs.

Several speakers will also share their personal experiences with suicide, including Jonathan Quigley, who fronts My Savior Story, a Christian rock band from Meridian. Quigley said that awareness is key in fighting the stigma of suicide.

“One of my best friends killed himself,” he said. “So I’m looking forward to helping out…The first step is admitting that you have a problem, and that’s really hard to do.”

Winslett emphasizes that, despite the serious subject matter, the day will be enlightening, not depressing. After the music, the crowd will gather in prayer, then release hundreds of balloons in memory of loved ones lost to suicide.

“We want this to be a celebration,” Winslett said. “We don’t want it to be a sad experience.”