KPC? Keeping Parents Clueless

Published 11:45 pm Saturday, July 4, 2009

Congratulations to all the moms and dads who know how to interpret OMG, IDK, and LOL (Oh My Gosh, I Don’t Know, and Laughing Out Loud). But don’t enroll in the “hip parent club” just yet – apparently the kids are way ahead of us.

This should come as no surprise though, since it’s always been that way. In fact, I’d say that as long as adolescents have existed, (now known as ‘tweens’, ‘teens’, and ‘extended adolescents’), they’ve had access to information that we’ve had trouble deciphering.

While I admit there is much known to our current generation of youngsters that I don’t care to know, I’ve also realized that not knowing enough can lead to trouble right under our nose. As parents, we have to stay on top of this secret culture of theirs in order to smell a rat when one is looking us square in the eyes.

So let me impart some adolescent wisdom that has been imparted onto me. First, if your teen is using a normal, innocent word, but they are using it out of context, your ears should perk up like a German shepherd listening for an intruder. Why? Well, let me give you a few examples.

Imagine for a moment that your sweet baby boy, aged 16 now, is on the phone with his friend and you hear him say something about a school bus or a blue football. You think, “How nice, it’s the middle of summer and his mind is still on the school year.” Well please know that while you’re being impressed by his academic mindfulness, he’s letting the person on the other end of the phone know what milligram of Xanax he’d like to purchase.

Second, if lots of nonsensical abbreviations are being used in instant messages, emails, or texts, investigate. For instance, the following, RUEZ, IWSN, RUH, TDTM, and the number 8, typically all indicate messages of a sexual nature. I will neither bore nor shock you with what they mean, but I will say that RUH does not mean ‘Are you hungry?’ Again parents, the ears…they should be high and pointed.

Third, if you hear your child use the names “Anna” or “Mia”, they are not referring to the nice girl in their third period class. The use of Ana or Mia could mean your child is flirting with an eating disorder (Anorexia or Bulimia).

Just the other day, I was schooled on the new term ‘Anna bracelet’. It was being used in conversation by a tween female and I immediately latched on. “Why did you call it an Anna bracelet?” I suspiciously asked? “Because it doesn’t stretch, and it doesn’t open. So the only way it can fit on your wrist is if you are thin enough…only skinny girls can wear it.” Well of course, I thought.

Finally, texts containing the letter ‘P’ as soon as you walk in the room, likely indicate your child is letting the other person know of your presence, and therefore, to curb future statements. The use of POS (parent looking over the shoulder), PAL (parents are listening), and my favorite, P911 (parent alert), are all used in an effort to censor texts coming and going as long as you are around, just in case you happen to see one of them. In other words, the discussion that you happened upon is not one they want you to hear.

So remember parents, anything that seems to be out of context, is probably well within context, and just used to KPC – keep parents clueless. After all, that preppy, tennis-playing, Wallabie- wearing teen of yours has not just surprisingly developed an interest in the field of agriculture. Oh no. If he’s talking to his friend about pharming, what he means is that he’s about to raid your medicine cabinet for prescriptions.

For further information, www.2smrt4u.com, www.theantidrug.com, www.netsmartz.org, www.netlingo.com, www.whitehousedrugpolicy.gov/streetterms/



Dr. Susan Eaves is a behavioral specialist and therapist in the Division of Children and Youth Services at Weems Community Mental Health. E-mail her at seaves@weemsmh.com.

Newsletter sign up WIDGET

Email newsletter signup