Dear Sidney,

I know a lot of people use your column for advice, but advice is not what I am looking for. I just want to sound off. Not long ago I attended a wedding for the daughter of a friend. (Actually I feel like she is my own daughter because we have been so close.) I know a sizeable amount of money was spent on the occasion, as it was a very nice wedding. I am sure a good amount was spent for photography as well, and I am glad she has the photos, because I can't remember anything from the ceremony but the photographer. I have been to many weddings, and have never seen a photographer be so obtrusive. Most of the time they work behind the scenes capturing those moments that can only be appreciated by the trained eye and later enjoyed by the bride and groom. Not this one. She was all over the place. Click, Click, Click. You would have thought this was the moment that would determine her career. You could not hear the minister for her clicking away. At one point I even noticed the mother of the bride looking frustrated when this photographer stood in her line of vision. I know this is none of my business, and I am sure the photos were probably worth all of the distraction, but wouldn't you think the photographer would know you shouldn't try to distract from the bride. I would never say anything, but it did show me that when my own daughter's time comes, I will choose the photographer carefully and make sure they blend into the background, and not become part of the wedding party.

Signed

Missed it all



Dear Missed,

You know, it's a shame that brides plan and plan for the perfect wedding thinking it's the one day in their life that defines them as a woman. But, more often than not, it's the most frustrating day because there sits the new wife glaring at the ex-wife, or the hungover groomsmen thinking that sockless-in-a-tux is okay or the adorable little ringbearer coming down the aisle with his finger up his nose. The fact is, a wedding in a church should be a sacred event--a man and a woman vowing to God to be faithful to one another. And, the "hired help" should realize that as well and a real professional would know that..it's NOT about the music, the color of the dresses or the perfect picture. It's a shame that the wedding that you attended had a less than professional photographer. Just know that when it's time for your little darling to get hitched, you'll know who NOT to call.



• Sidney Covington has a master's degree in counseling. She is a patient advocate and public relations

representative for Riley Hospital.