The holiday season is here. Even though some retailers have been selling Christmas stuff for two months, the official kick-off for everyone else has now arrived.

I was having a discussion with a man at a book signing the other day. He was born, raised, and lived in the North but retired down here to be with his children. The discussion eventually turned to holidays in the North versus holidays in the South. He said that holidays in the North were better than holidays down here. I immediately disagreed an asked him to give me an example of what makes a Northern holiday better than a Southern holiday.

“Take cranberries, for instance,” he said. “Up there, we harvest fresh cranberries. Down here, you guys just plop them on a saucer right out of the can.”

“O.K., so that’s one,” I said.

“When I was a boy,” he continued, “It snowed almost every Christmas.” Ouch. Northerner - 2 Robert - 0. I started trying to think of a snappy comeback, but there were people in line with books to be signed and I couldn’t focus. He eventually walked away. Afterward, I felt as if I let my region down.

Therefore, today I will set the record straight as to why Southern holidays are better than the ones celebrated up North.

In the North they eat stuffing. Stuffing is bland and crunchy and probably has chestnuts in it. Down here it’s all about cornbread dressing. Cornbread dressing— when made correctly— can be a substitute for the main course. I can eat two helpings of dressing with gravy and skip the turkey all together. I don’t, but I could. I’m not sure if they even eat cornbread up there. If they do, it’s sweet and they call it Johnny Cakes or some silly name like that.

Up there, they’re cooking and eating goose. Down here we’re smoking turkey. A goose is gamey and greasy. A smoked turkey— as long as it has been brined and cooked correctly— is flavorful and healthy, not to mention the prospect of turkey sandwiches, turkey salad, turkey casserole, and turkey pot pie for several days afterwards.

Up there it’s all about pudding— figgy pudding, hasty pudding, kidney pudding, and cheese pudding. Down here we live and die by the Pyrex casserole dish, and we’ll put any combination of any vegetables in there.

Even though many Southerners put marshmallows on top of their sweet potatoes, I’ll bet in was a Northerner who had the idea first.

Sure they have white Christmases, but they’re also shoveling snow. We’re just raking pine straw. They’re dealing with Christmas morning Nor’easters while we’re waking up to a weather forecast in the low 70s and overcast. O.K., so maybe that one’s a tie.

Ice hockey versus football… give me a break. It’s not even close. Up there it’s “Happy Holidays,” down here, we say “Merry Christmas.” They’ve got flight delays from heavy travel, traffic jams, and bland food.

In Manhattan, while browsing a department store, you’ll hear Mariah Carey singing “All I Want For Christmas Is You.” Four words: Elvis Presley “Blue Christmas.”

The North is pumping out bands like The Trans-Siberian Orchestra. I spent a year of my life one night at a Trans-Siberian Orchestra Christmas concert. I left at intermission. I wouldn’t trade 20 Trans-Siberian Orchestras for George Jones’ version of “Oh Come All Ye Faithful.” That, my friends, is a spiritual experience. All of the Manheim Steamroller synthesized Christmas bands combined can’t compare to Emmylou Harris with an acoustic guitar singing “Silent Night.”

In the end, I think the main difference is the people. Seven out of the top 10 most-charitable states, based on per-capita income, are in the South. Mississippi is number one. By the way, the other three are in the Midwest. It’s the season for giving. Remember those less fortunate this Christmas, even if they do live up North.



Robert St.John is a restaurateur, chef, and author of the newly released “Dispatches From My South.” He can be reached at www.robertstjohn.com.





Delta Tomatoes:

2 Tbl Butter

1 Tbl Olive Oil

1 /2 cup Onion, medium dice

1 /2 cup Celery, medium dice

1 /2 cup Bell pepper, medium dice

28 oz can Tomatoes, diced

1 /4 cup Sugar

1 /4 cup Brown sugar

2 Tbl Fresh basil, chopped

2 tsp Dried basil

2 Tbl Cornstarch

2 Tbl Balsamic Vinegar

2 tsp Lawry’s Seasoned Salt

1 /2 tsp Black pepper

1 1 /4 cup Seasoned breadcrumbs

1 /4 cup Melted Butter

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Sautee onion, celery and bell pepper in butter and olive oil. Cook until onions are soft and translucent. Add tomatoes, both sugars and both basils. Mix cornstarch in vinegar and add to tomato mixture. Bring to a boil. Add salt and pepper and pour into a greased casserole dish. Mix together breadcrumbs and butter. Top tomatoes with breadcrumbs and bake 30-45 minutes or until filling is bubbly and breadcrumbs are lightly browned.



Yield: 10 – 12 servings